What is a good man?

I've got an idea...

Typically, that is a dangerous thing for me.

Typically, my ideas can result in any number of outcomes...

Typically, embarrassment.

Typically, I do what's comfortable to me. I'm afraid to be atypical...to challenge myself...to expect more from myself...to be a good man.

Typically...I'm starting to hate that word.

Typically my means of satisfaction are quick and potent. I eat fast food. I chug beer. I watch television. Rinse and repeat.

Typically, I hear a voice in my head telling me I'm better than who I am at the moment. Life is more meaningful than I'm making it. I should be further along--more enlightened, successful, and happy.

And never, no matter how much I try to ignore it, does that voice go away.

Paul Simon said it best in his song "Train in the Distance." "The thought that life could be better is woven indelibly into our hearts and our brains. Like a train in the distance." Humankind expects more from itself, and is constantly reminded by some voice that is both distant, and unmistakably present..."Life is better than what you're making it!"

This is not a new thought. I realize that...but I'm struggling with it. I want my life to be better, and most importantly, I want to be a good man.

But, what is a good man?

Last night I stumbled onto a blog while searching for a list of "great books." At first glance I thought it was a joke. Its decor consisted of a wood paneling background with pictures of old-fashioned mustache clad manly-men. At the top of the page, in antique text, was the title: "The Art of Manliness."

"What could this be?" I said aloud with a chuckle, and spent the next hour scouring the pages within. After doing a little research I discovered that this was a blog authored by a husband and wife in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and designed to provide articles and advice to help men "be better husbands, fathers, and men." I've included a link to the "About" section of the page that describes their purpose right here.

Eventually, I made my way back to what led me there in the first place--a list of "great books." Not just any list however, but, 100 Must-Read Books: The Essential Man's Library. As I looked the list over, I started getting excited. Here was the answer to my question.

What is a good man?

Within the pages of these classic literary pieces are countless examples of successes and failures, virtues and demons, and lessons to be learned, as men, much wiser than I, have, one way or another, strove to answer this same question and find more meaning in life.

So my idea is this: I'm going to read them...gulp...all. With my trusty library card in hand, I'm going to read all 100 books on this list and chronicle my findings. (It's very Julie and Julia of me I know...)

It will be challenging/time consuming/boring at times and I may miss a few episodes of The Office because of it. I mean seriously, who reads anymore?

It's certainly not the way I would typically spend an evening. Oops, there's that word again.

Typically, the fear of failure outweighs the desire to try. Not this time. So, maybe when that voice comes calling again, like a train in the distance, I just might have an answer.